Liar, Liar
Sermon notes from Pastor Don Roscoe at Grace Church on lying, manipulation, and the consequences seen in the lives of Jacob, Samson, Delilah, and Haman.
Liar, Liar
Pastor Don Roscoe | Grace Church
Part of the Tricks and Treats series, looking at Old Testament people known for deception and manipulation.
Tricks and Treats
Tricksters use their words, wits, and behavior to deceive. They usually want to gain something at someone else’s expense.
The “treats” part of this series is about getting to know one another. As individuals and families, step outside your comfort zone and spend time with people you do not already know.
Change your view of church from something you attend to something you are. We are a family that cares for and supports one another.
Getting to Know People
The church’s October 25 gathering on the property offers games, food, and time to walk and talk together. Invite a friend to join you.
The October 31 downtown candy outreach is another opportunity to represent Jesus through kindness, conversation, and a welcoming invitation. It is a chance to get to know people in a non-threatening setting.
We All Do It
Lying and deception are universal behaviors. Some have made them an art form; others have tried to restrain themselves. That does not make lying right.
God hates lying in all forms. The Bible records people who lied, deceived, and manipulated, but recording their behavior does not mean God approved of it.
If we are Christians, why would we continue in something God hates?
Look for Yourself
The article mentioned in the online sermon notes describes common kinds of liars. The challenge is to identify yourself, not your spouse or your friend.
Every lie, deception, and act of manipulation has consequences. We often do not know how far those consequences will reach.
When parents lie, what are they teaching their children? Those children can carry the same behavior into their friendships, workplaces, and future families.
The Bible Shows Our Fallenness
The Old Testament does not present flawless people. Its stories reveal human sin, not human perfection.
Rather than looking at a biblical character and saying, “Look at everything they did,” look into the story as a mirror. Do you see any of that in your own life?
These people were like us, and we are like them.
A Wrestling Match
The Christian life is a struggle between the life Jesus calls us to live and the habits, memories, and desires we have practiced for years.
Pastor Don described wrestling between being faithful and fearful, between loving God and finding identity in work, and between feeling morally successful and feeling like a failure.
Instead of trying to prove ourselves, we can begin the day with gratitude: “God, just thank you for saving me. What can I do for you?”
Read the Stories as a Mirror
- Reflect honestly on your own life.
- Weigh the costs and consequences of your behavior and attitudes.
- Decide whether you will seek God or seek yourself.
- Learn the lessons and apply them as you move forward with God.
Consequences can reach beyond one person to a family, a community, or even a nation. We do not know how today’s deception may affect people years from now.
Why Do We Lie?
We may struggle to explain our reasons, but our behavior has motives. We lie, deceive, or manipulate:
- To accumulate possessions or wealth.
- To protect ourselves or others.
- To escape punishment.
- To avoid embarrassment.
- To win approval or admiration.
- To maintain privacy.
- To gain power over others.
Appearances Are Not Character
- Not everyone who is intelligent is wise.
- Not everyone who appears successful is righteous.
- Not everyone who smiles at you has good intentions.
Looking good and sounding good do not prove that someone is good. We need discernment about character.
Jacob: Taking Advantage
Jacob was Isaac’s son and Abraham’s grandson. When his brother Esau came home hungry, Jacob saw an opportunity to get something he wanted.
Rather than simply feeding his brother, he demanded Esau’s birthright in exchange for a meal.
30 He said to Jacob, “Let me eat some of that red stew, for I am famished.” (That is why he was also called Edom.)
31 “First sell me your birthright,” Jacob replied.
32 “Look,” said Esau, “I am about to die, so what good is a birthright to me?”
33 “Swear to me first,” Jacob said. So Esau swore to Jacob and sold him the birthright.
34 Then Jacob gave some bread and lentil stew to Esau, who ate and drank and then got up and went away. Thus Esau despised his birthright.
A Bowl of Stew for a Birthright
Esau treated his immediate hunger as more important than his birthright. Jacob used that hunger to his own advantage.
The birthright involved headship of the family. Jacob wanted that position, and Esau despised what he had.
Manipulation means trying to control or influence someone to your advantage, often through tactics or tricks that get them to do what you want.
2 “Look,” said Isaac, “I am now old, and I do not know the day of my death.
3 Take your weapons—your quiver and bow—and go out into the field to hunt some game for me.
4 Then prepare a tasty dish that I love and bring it to me to eat, so that I may bless you before I die.”
5 Now Rebekah was listening to what Isaac told his son Esau. So when Esau went into the field to hunt game and bring it back,
6 Rebekah said to her son Jacob, “Behold, I overheard your father saying to your brother Esau,
7 ‘Bring me some game and prepare me a tasty dish to eat, so that I may bless you in the presence of the LORD before I die.’
8 Now, my son, listen to my voice and do exactly as I tell you.
9 Go out to the flock and bring me two choice young goats, so that I can make them into a tasty dish for your father—the kind he loves.
10 Then take it to your father to eat, so that he may bless you before he dies.”
11 Jacob answered his mother Rebekah, “Look, my brother Esau is a hairy man, but I am smooth-skinned.
12 What if my father touches me? Then I would be revealed to him as a deceiver, and I would bring upon myself a curse rather than a blessing.”
13 His mother replied, “Your curse be on me, my son. Just obey my voice and go get them for me.”
14 So Jacob went and got two goats and brought them to his mother, who made the tasty food his father loved.
15 And Rebekah took the finest clothes in the house that belonged to her older son Esau, and she put them on her younger son Jacob.
16 She also put the skins of the young goats on his hands and on the smooth part of his neck.
17 Then she handed her son Jacob the tasty food and bread she had made.
18 So Jacob went to his father and said, “My father.” “Here I am!” he answered. “Which one are you, my son?”
19 Jacob said to his father, “I am Esau, your firstborn. I have done as you told me. Please sit up and eat some of my game, so that you may bless me.”
20 But Isaac asked his son, “How did you ever find it so quickly, my son?” “Because the LORD your God brought it to me,” he replied.
21 Then Isaac said to Jacob, “Please come closer so I can touch you, my son. Are you really my son Esau, or not?”
22 So Jacob came close to his father Isaac, who touched him and said, “The voice is the voice of Jacob, but the hands are the hands of Esau.”
23 Isaac did not recognize him, because his hands were hairy like those of his brother Esau; so he blessed him.
24 Again he asked, “Are you really my son Esau?” And he replied, “I am.”
25 “Serve me,” said Isaac, “and let me eat some of my son’s game, so that I may bless you.” Jacob brought it to him, and he ate; then he brought him wine, and he drank.
26 Then his father Isaac said to him, “Please come near and kiss me, my son.”
27 So he came near and kissed him. When Isaac smelled his clothing, he blessed him and said: “Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the LORD has blessed.
28 May God give to you the dew of heaven and the richness of the earth— an abundance of grain and new wine.
29 May peoples serve you and nations bow down to you. May you be the master of your brothers, and may the sons of your mother bow down to you. May those who curse you be cursed, and those who bless you be blessed.”
30 As soon as Isaac had finished blessing him and Jacob had left his father’s presence, his brother Esau returned from the hunt.
31 He too made some tasty food, brought it to his father, and said to him, “My father, sit up and eat of your son’s game, so that you may bless me.”
32 But his father Isaac replied, “Who are you?” “I am Esau, your firstborn son,” he answered.
33 Isaac began to tremble violently and said, “Who was it, then, who hunted the game and brought it to me? Before you came in, I ate it all and blessed him—and indeed, he will be blessed!”
34 When Esau heard his father’s words, he let out a loud and bitter cry and said to his father, “Bless me too, O my father!”
35 But Isaac replied, “Your brother came deceitfully and took your blessing.”
36 So Esau declared, “Is he not rightly named Jacob? For he has cheated me twice. He took my birthright, and now he has taken my blessing.” Then he asked, “Haven’t you saved a blessing for me?”
37 But Isaac answered Esau: “Look, I have made him your master and given him all his relatives as servants; I have sustained him with grain and new wine. What is left that I can do for you, my son?”
38 Esau said to his father, “Do you have only one blessing, my father? Bless me too, O my father!” Then Esau wept aloud.
39 His father Isaac answered him: “Behold, your dwelling place shall be away from the richness of the land, away from the dew of heaven above.
40 You shall live by the sword and serve your brother. But when you rebel, you will tear his yoke from your neck.”
41 Esau held a grudge against Jacob because of the blessing his father had given him. And Esau said in his heart, “The days of mourning for my father are at hand; then I will kill my brother Jacob.”
42 When the words of her older son Esau were relayed to Rebekah, she sent for her younger son Jacob and told him, “Look, your brother Esau is consoling himself by plotting to kill you.
43 So now, my son, obey my voice and flee at once to my brother Laban in Haran.
44 Stay with him for a while, until your brother’s fury subsides—
45 until your brother’s rage against you wanes and he forgets what you have done to him. Then I will send for you and bring you back from there. Why should I lose both of you in one day?”
46 Then Rebekah said to Isaac, “I am weary of my life because of these Hittite women. If Jacob takes a Hittite wife from among them, what good is my life?”
Jacob: Deceiving for the Blessing
Jacob later deceived his father to obtain the blessing. He did not merely want the family’s material authority; he wanted its spiritual headship as well.
His own story later included being deceived by his father-in-law and spending years struggling for the material wealth he wanted.
The patterns of lying in Abraham’s and Isaac’s lives also appeared in Jacob’s life. Our deception affects others, including our own families.
Jacob: Questions for Us
- Have you intentionally taken advantage of someone because you wanted something?
- Have you manipulated a family member, classmate, or business contact for selfish gain?
- Have you personally misled someone or conspired with others to mislead them?
God carried out his plan in spite of Jacob’s deception. That did not spare Jacob the consequences of his choices.
The costs and consequences of manipulation are many, and they keep unfolding. Once something has been said or done, it can be very difficult to stop its effects.
Samson and Delilah
God chose Samson from birth to lead his people. He had great strength and influence, but also serious character flaws.
He cut corners, sought attention, loved showing off, and had a violent temper. He repeatedly chose a way of life opposite to his calling.
Then he fell in love with Delilah.
5 The lords of the Philistines went to her and said, “Entice him and find out the source of his great strength and how we can overpower him to tie him up and subdue him. Then each one of us will give you eleven hundred shekels of silver. ”
6 So Delilah said to Samson, “Please tell me the source of your great strength and how you can be tied up and subdued.”
7 Samson told her, “If they tie me up with seven fresh bowstrings that have not been dried, I will become as weak as any other man.”
8 So the lords of the Philistines brought her seven fresh bowstrings that had not been dried, and she tied him up with them.
9 While the men were hidden in her room, she called out, “Samson, the Philistines are here!” But he snapped the bowstrings like a strand of yarn seared by a flame. So the source of his strength remained unknown.
10 Then Delilah said to Samson, “You have mocked me and lied to me! Now please tell me how you can be tied up.”
11 He replied, “If they tie me up with new ropes that have never been used, I will become as weak as any other man.”
12 So Delilah took new ropes, tied him up with them, and called out, “Samson, the Philistines are here!” But while the men were hidden in her room, he snapped the ropes off his arms like they were threads.
13 Then Delilah said to Samson, “You have mocked me and lied to me all along! Tell me how you can be tied up.” He told her, “If you weave the seven braids of my head into the web of a loom and tighten it with a pin, I will become as weak as any other man. ”
14 So while he slept, Delilah took the seven braids of his hair and wove them into the web. Then she tightened it with a pin and called to him, “Samson, the Philistines are here!” But he awoke from his sleep and pulled out the pin with the loom and the web.
15 “How can you say, ‘I love you,’” she asked, “when your heart is not with me? This is the third time you have mocked me and failed to reveal to me the source of your great strength!”
16 Finally, after she had pressed him daily with her words and pleaded until he was sick to death,
17 Samson told her all that was in his heart: “My hair has never been cut, because I have been a Nazirite to God from my mother’s womb. If I am shaved, my strength will leave me, and I will become as weak as any other man.”
18 When Delilah realized that he had revealed to her all that was in his heart, she sent this message to the lords of the Philistines: “Come up once more, for he has revealed to me all that is in his heart.” Then the lords of the Philistines came to her, bringing the money in their hands.
19 And having lulled him to sleep on her lap, she called a man to shave off the seven braids of his head. In this way she began to subdue him, and his strength left him.
20 Then she called out, “Samson, the Philistines are here!” When Samson awoke from his sleep, he thought, “I will escape as I did before and shake myself free.” But he did not know that the LORD had departed from him.
21 Then the Philistines seized him, gouged out his eyes, and brought him down to Gaza, where he was bound with bronze shackles and forced to grind grain in the prison.
Delilah: Selling Someone Out
The Philistine rulers offered Delilah silver if she would discover the secret of Samson’s strength so they could overpower him.
His strength came from God, not merely from his hair. His uncut hair was connected to the vow under which he was to live for God.
Delilah betrayed him. His hair was cut, the Philistines captured him, and they gouged out his eyes.
Have you ever sold someone out, or conspired to do so, for money, popularity, or prestige?
Consequences We Did Not Expect
Samson did not begin by imagining that he would lose his sight and become an object of mockery. But his choices kept moving him toward consequences he had not considered.
Delilah was asked to help capture him. The brutality that followed was an additional consequence.
Our behavior can have consequences that were never part of what we expected or were promised.
An Undisciplined Life
An undisciplined life leads to an undesired future.
Samson acted as though his strength would let him get away with his choices. We can do the same, assuming we are smart enough to escape the consequences or talk our way out.
Pressure can wear us down. One compromise can lead to another, like a row of falling dominoes.
Haman: When Honor Is Not Enough
Haman was a chief adviser to King Xerxes. He had wealth, status, and access to the king, yet he became furious because Mordecai would not rise or show fear in his presence.
He gathered his wife and friends, boasted about everything he had, and still found no satisfaction because one man would not give him the recognition he wanted.
10 Nevertheless, Haman restrained himself and went home. And calling for his friends and his wife Zeresh,
11 Haman recounted to them his glorious wealth, his many sons, and all the ways the king had honored and promoted him over the other officials and servants.
12 “What is more,” Haman added, “Queen Esther invited no one but me to join the king at the banquet she prepared, and I am invited back tomorrow along with the king.
13 Yet none of this satisfies me as long as I see Mordecai the Jew sitting at the king’s gate.”
14 His wife Zeresh and all his friends told him, “Have them build a gallows fifty cubits high, and ask the king in the morning to have Mordecai hanged on it. Then go to the banquet with the king and enjoy yourself.” The advice pleased Haman, and he had the gallows constructed.
Haman: Pride Becomes Revenge
Haman’s wife and friends encouraged him to prepare a tall pole on which to have Mordecai impaled.
His resentment did not stop with one man. He deceived the king, concealed his motives, and sought the destruction of Mordecai’s people as well.
How petty must we become to let one person ruin our day? We can overlook all the good we have because someone has not given us the respect, opportunity, or recognition we think we deserve.
What Goes Around Comes Around
Esther exposed Haman’s plot. In the end, Haman died in the way he had intended for Mordecai.
His story warns us about concealed motives, twisted facts, resentment, and the desire to hurt others.
We know we all lie, deceive, and manipulate. The question is not whether those behaviors are familiar. The question is whether we should continue in them.
Go to God First
Before reacting in anger, pursuing something at another person’s expense, or speaking a half-truth, go to God.
Before the conversation with your boss, coach, spouse, or children, acknowledge your sinfulness and ask God to help you speak truth.
In these examples, the people acted as though they knew best instead of going to God first. If we are going to represent Jesus, we need to check in with him before we act.
Allow Others to Hold You Accountable
Someone cannot hold you accountable unless you allow it.
If you need help in an area of your life, ask someone to walk with you. Find someone who will call, text, sit down with you, and speak honestly about your life.
That is part of how we make progress beyond where we are now.
Closing Prayer
Father, we know who we are, but you love us and saved us anyway. You want us to honor you and be a blessing to other people.
Use us this week as truth tellers, as people who are honest and do not try to get their own way. Help us understand your goodness and how you want to use us in people’s lives.
As we speak truth and ask others to hold us accountable, may we make progress. May others come to faith because they see you in us and through us.
In Jesus’ name, amen.
